{"id":4221,"date":"2015-02-14T15:02:06","date_gmt":"2015-02-14T23:02:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/?p=4221"},"modified":"2015-02-14T15:07:02","modified_gmt":"2015-02-14T23:07:02","slug":"tried-use-job-regain-identity","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/gov-talk\/career-advice\/tried-use-job-regain-identity\/","title":{"rendered":"I Tried to Use a Job to Regain my Identity!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/gov-talk\/career-advice\/tried-use-job-regain-identity\/attachment\/job-identity\/\" rel=\"attachment wp-att-4223\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-4223\" src=\"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/job-identity.jpg\" alt=\"job identity\" width=\"500\" height=\"334\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/job-identity.jpg 500w, https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/job-identity-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/job-identity-480x320.jpg 480w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><\/a>You may be wondering, &#8220;What the heck is she talking about?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>When I ventured back into to the workplace working for the federal government, I did not consider <strong>ALL THINGS<\/strong>! I just wanted to get back out there and regain my independence and feel like I was on my way somewhere! I made an emotional decision driven by my own insecurities and fear of losing my identity from becoming a Wife and Mother. Everything in my life was centered around my husband and children. At the children&#8217;s school events I no longer had a name. I was referred to as &#8220;Such and such Mom.&#8221; All trips were family related and my husband and I rarely did anything outside the children. I slowly started to lose my zest for life and I knew I had to do something quick to reclaim MYSELF! So, I accepted a full time federal position without fully weighing all the options including the salary, location, promotion potential and flexibility.<\/p>\n<p>This venture wasn&#8217;t all what it cracked up to be!<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>The <em>salary<\/em> sucked and the raises were next to none! I figured it would be ok because I worked in the salon part-time so the additional income would compensate for the unattractive salary. I eventually left the salon because it conflicted with my children&#8217;s activities. With no extra income, I began to get discouraged but husbands&#8217; salary was substantial so I tolerated it.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>The <em>location<\/em> was close to home which was convenient because my husband&#8217;s work commute was 90-minutes one-way.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>There was no <em>promotion potential! <\/em>You know the saying, &#8220;What you see is what you get&#8221;, well that was pretty much it. My Supervisor eluded to the possibility of moving within but I found out later, it was a DEAD END.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<ul>\n<li>The only <em>flexibility<\/em> was the ability to chose my work schedule. Some federal agencies allow employees to work from home(telework) and to exercise during the work day. Neither one of these options were available to me although it was at my Supervisor&#8217;s discretion.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Let&#8217;s get down to the real problem, MANAGEMENT!<\/p>\n<p>Management not only controlled the salary, promotion potential and flexibility, they wanted to control me! I am an extrovert and I love interacting with people. My first week employed there it was a known fact you had to be <strong>QUIET<\/strong>. It was a cubicle office setting so being respectful of others were warranted but whispering and tip toeing around the building was pushing it! Conversations weren&#8217;t allowed and if the director saw anyone talking in the hallway or near the copiers she would say something. After a awhile, we knew to leave if we saw her coming. I started feeling like I was in the office version of the &#8216;Hunger Games (2012)&#8217;.<\/p>\n<p>I said to myself, &#8220;This can&#8217;t be it?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Although I had ALL the signs not to take the job, I took it anyway. My insecurities led me to a job I knew wasn&#8217;t right for me. When I became a Wife and a Mother all my decisions were based on what was best for the family, not myself. I thought placing my family first would make me happy but I realized that wasn&#8217;t true. One unanalyzed decision let to another one and in the end I was aggravated, bewildered and unhappy! I felt like my life was no longer mines.<\/p>\n<p>I learned how to take time for myself and weigh all the pros and cons before taking a job. Today, I make decisions based on what&#8217;s good for <strong>ME<\/strong> and my family.<\/p>\n<p>Know what is important in your life and what you&#8217;re willing to negotiate. The workplace should enhance you and make you a better person not strip you of your pride and dignity. It&#8217;s up to you to work on your insecurities before you seek employment. Remember you attract who you are and you get back what you put into the universe.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>You may be wondering, &#8220;What the heck is she talking about?&#8221; When I ventured back into to the workplace working for the federal government, I did not consider ALL THINGS! I just wanted to get back out there and regain my independence and feel like I was on my way somewhere! I made an emotional [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3021,"featured_media":4223,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_cbd_carousel_blocks":"[]","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[18],"tags":[41,49],"class_list":["post-4221","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-career-advice","tag-career-advice-2","tag-career-strategies"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>I Tried to Use a Job to Regain my Identity!  - Careers in Government<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/gov-talk\/career-advice\/tried-use-job-regain-identity\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"I Tried to Use a Job to Regain my Identity!  - Careers in Government\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"You may be wondering, &#8220;What the heck is she talking about?&#8221; When I ventured back into to the workplace working for the federal government, I did not consider ALL THINGS! 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In 2012, Shakena closed the store\\\/salon and completed her Bachelors degree and started pursuing her Masters in Public Relations. As an administrative and beauty professional, Shakena had the opportunity to interact with diverse groups of women. Shakena and many other women had the same story of sacrifice; they put their families first and struggled to rekindle their own personal and professional growth. Shakena motivated and encouraged women because she knew the impact a woman can make on her family and community when she value and love herself. Throughout her travels and interactions in life, she realized women faced the same issues regardless of their ethnic, financial or social status. Shakena started redoing her family and friends resumes to help them get back into the workforce or acquire a better paying job. Not only did they get the job, they regained their confidence and self esteem! 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Valuable tools for job seekers and employers.","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/#organization"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/#organization","name":"Careers in Government","url":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/CIG-horizontal-dark-v2.png","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/11\/CIG-horizontal-dark-v2.png","width":"708","height":"480","caption":"Careers in Government"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/"},"sameAs":["https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/CareersInGovernment","https:\/\/x.com\/careersingov","https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/careersingov\/"]},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/#\/schema\/person\/0b72b24bc87568e85a52d8df7f84200e","name":"Shakena Warren","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/d3851b365b5c90e36afbc5bafd7da8028d6f29a37b3af241a1b9af524926d753?s=96&d=mm&r=g","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/d3851b365b5c90e36afbc5bafd7da8028d6f29a37b3af241a1b9af524926d753?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/d3851b365b5c90e36afbc5bafd7da8028d6f29a37b3af241a1b9af524926d753?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"Shakena Warren"},"description":"Shakena Warren was born and raised in New Jersey. She started pushing at an early age raising her younger sisters. Her mother got swept up into the drug scene in the 1980\u2019s and continues to struggle with her addiction today. Shakena believed young girls without guidance could be lost to the streets. She took the responsibility for her younger sisters and became their role model. In 1994, Shakena graduated from high school and started her freshman year of college. By this time she had 3 sisters, ages 12, 2 and a 1 month old baby. Shakena intentions were to complete a four year degree in Communications but she only completed two and joined the workforce. At this time Shakena placed her focus on ways to stay employable to provide for her sisters. Shakena always had amazing talent for doing hair! She comes from a female dominated family which gave her all the practice she needed. Shakena enrolled in Cosmetology school part-time at night and worked temporary administrative jobs during the day. In 1998, Shakena obtained a NJ State Cosmetology license and worked full time in the salon for a few years. Her income as a hairstylist was profitable but she wanted to become computer savvy to create more opportunities. She was interested in applying for jobs in beauty companies where she could blend her administrative and cosmetology backgrounds. She completed a four month computer applications course. Two years later, she enlisted in United States Navy and provided administrative, personnel and human resource services to military personnel. While stationed overseas, she performed hair services for military and civilian women on the weekends. Shakena met her husband, married and had two children while they were in the Navy. In August of 2008 they opened a beauty supply store\/salon in Hagerstown, MD where they resided. A year later, she decided to leave the Navy with an honorable discharge to focus on her family and business. In 2012, Shakena closed the store\/salon and completed her Bachelors degree and started pursuing her Masters in Public Relations. As an administrative and beauty professional, Shakena had the opportunity to interact with diverse groups of women. Shakena and many other women had the same story of sacrifice; they put their families first and struggled to rekindle their own personal and professional growth. Shakena motivated and encouraged women because she knew the impact a woman can make on her family and community when she value and love herself. Throughout her travels and interactions in life, she realized women faced the same issues regardless of their ethnic, financial or social status. Shakena started redoing her family and friends resumes to help them get back into the workforce or acquire a better paying job. Not only did they get the job, they regained their confidence and self esteem! Ladies, you can do anything and be anybody you want to be, just keep pushing!","sameAs":["http:\/\/www.shepush.com\/home.html","https:\/\/x.com\/@shakenawar"],"url":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/author\/shakenaw\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4221","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3021"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4221"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4221\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4226,"href":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4221\/revisions\/4226"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/4223"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4221"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4221"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.careersingovernment.com\/tools\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4221"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}